What is Functional Burnout?
Ever feel like you're running on fumes but just can't seem to stop? Like you're constantly pushing past your limits, even though your brain and body are screaming for a break? You might be experiencing what I call "functional burnout."
Now, you might be familiar with autistic burnout in general. It's that feeling of overwhelming exhaustion and reduced capacity that can sometimes make even the simplest tasks feel impossible. You know, the kind of burnout where you can barely get out of bed, let alone function in daily life.
But what I'm talking about here is a bit different. It's that sneaky kind of burnout where you don't completely lose the ability to function. You keep going, even though you're running on a serious spoon deficit. It's like there's a "function at all costs" switch flipped on in your brain, and you're terrified to turn it off.
I suspect a lot of us, especially autistic parents (and let's be real, especially autistic moms), know this feeling all too well. We're constantly caring for others, managing everyone else's needs, and somehow still managing to keep all the plates spinning. But at what cost?
Spotting the Signs
So how do you know if you're stuck in this cycle of functional burnout? Here are some telltale signs:
Feeling like you're barely keeping your head above water
Exhaustion that just won't quit
Feeling down or irritable
More frequent meltdowns
Brain fog and struggling with things that used to be easy
Wanting to withdraw from social situations
Feeling extra sensitive to sensory input
Leaning harder on stimming, repetitive behaviors, or self-soothing
Turning to potentially unhealthy coping mechanisms (like overspending or substance use)
Breaking the Cycle
Okay, so you recognize yourself in these signs. What can you actually do about it? Here are a few starting points:
Do less. I know, easier said than done, right? But it's crucial. Start by identifying the absolute essentials, the bare minimum you need to survive. For everything else, consider asking for help, delegating, or even letting some things slide (yes, really!).
Prioritize rest and recovery. This isn't a luxury, it's a necessity. Schedule it in, put it on your to-do list, whatever it takes. Figure out what truly recharges your batteries and make time for it. Stimming, special interests, anything that helps you regulate and replenish those spoons.
Be kind to yourself. It’s ok if you struggle to get it all done. That doesn’t make you a failure. Embrace radical self-acceptance and give yourself grace when you have to let some balls drop.
It might feel like the burnout is constant, but if you look closely, you might notice mini-cycles of stress, rest, and (hopefully) recovery. Pay attention to these patterns and learn to recognize your body's signals that you need a break.
Functional burnout is a real struggle, but it doesn't have to be a permanent state. By recognizing the signs and taking steps to prioritize your well-being, you can start to break the cycle and find a more sustainable way to live.
You're not alone in this. Hang in there, and remember to be kind to yourself. Your worth is not defined by your productivity.
Author’s Note:
An aspect of my autistic brain is that I have a very vivid mind’s eye and I think mainly in images. That means that expressing myself in written words is quite challenging. Speaking is easy. Writing is hard. That being said, I want to be up front about my use of AI in generating some of the text for this article. I gave it a draft of my ideas, and it made clear sentences for me. I consider this an accommodation for my brain because without it, I wouldn’t be able to articulate my thoughts in an easy-to-understand fashion. I have modified and edited where necessary.